petertorker (petertorker) wrote,

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vrooooooom vrooooooooom

Me and Justin are gonna start a new bike gang and call it The Huffy Industry. I'm using my sister's old Huffy bike, my uncle Petey has a sweet old Lexus motor and we're gonn stick that sucker in it and watch it go! Petey is my rich uncle who just got out of the Big House from down in Texas, they nabbed him for writing a few bad checks at Walmart, it was only for a few dozen soft pretzels, rope, duct tape, a video camera and a machete oh and I forgot about the twizlers. That dumb 'ol coot wAs on his way accross the macon dixon line when he was nabbed. He's my favorite uncle cuz he lets me and my cousin watch Girls Gone Wild and Trailor Park Sex Trilogy he's even good for some of that sweet concoction of fermented apples and sugar water. I don't care none that you have to go out side to use the bathroom, he swears he's got a ton of loot locked up in a bank somewhere in Swaziland or Switserland or something and I believe him cuz he walks the walk. One time I woke up at his trailor and a few days have passed and I am only wearing my super maN cape and dirty skivvies, he told me I had a good time with some friends of his old lady and I'll take his word for it. I just wish my nuts would stop burning, must be the moonshine.
Me and Justin are only gonna let cool people join our biker gang and to those faygs in Hooterville County,you caN just lick our bungs! That's absolutely the last time I will fall for the old, "hey Peter I know a really hot chick that has a huge crush on you and she wants you to take her to the dance this weekend" the last chick was so fat and wouldn't shut her big trap about how she took the hog callen blue ribbon at the county fair for the last few years. slut. I know where I like my bread buttered and it by no fat chick that has a nack for callen hogs.
More to come later on The Huffy Industry, we will be a force to be reckoned with. Gotta go now, one of my ants is about to lay eggs and I wanna take pickchures of it. Not to make a porno or anything.
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